Bye, Bye Beard, Hello Fat Head

This morning I said good bye to my beard which I have had since I was 19 years old.  The radiation has caused me to start losing hair in various parts of my head, including a large spot on the side of my head and a large patch on the side of my beard.  This missing spot made the whole beard look ridiculous, when various members of my family voted down a goatee, it was time for all of my facial hair to go.

On a whim I have shaved my beard off for a day or two in the past, but usually allowed my beard to grow back right away.  Once when I was younger I contemplated shaving my beard and Elyse said "I have only known you with a beard, what if I don't like you without a beard?" It is not always reassuring to find out that your relationship with your wife is based on your facial hair.  I am pleased to announce that Elyse saw me this morning with clean shaven face and while she laughed did not immediately ask me for a divorce.  My family has also been enjoying making fun of how fat my head looks since the steroids and radiation have made my face swell up.

I was wondering if I would have some profound thoughts about losing my hair and its meaning to my illness.  Instead all I can contemplate is how silly I look without a beard and a big patch of hair missing from the side of my head. I am also spending way too much time worrying if I will look silly wearing a baseball cap with my new suit to Elyse's fancy work holiday  party.  So much for enlightenment.